We're facebook friends in real life
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
