just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
