a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize