Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
