guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize