Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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