Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both