at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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