I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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