you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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