And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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