3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
