do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
