I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize