U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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