meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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