well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
