sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize