i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
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He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
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in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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