Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
