I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
