he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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