ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
