nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
