I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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