what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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