the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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