the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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