He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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