would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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