You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
