wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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