Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Randomize
