Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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