wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
