I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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