I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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