She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
