i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize