shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
The adults are the big ones right?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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