and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Randomize