I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize