The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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