So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
