so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
