WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize