I'm really into asian looking animals
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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