Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We have started to decorate penises.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
