come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
