Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
